Friday, October 28, 2016

Winter in the Rockies!

Immigration to Canada - before and after you get here

When my parents told me that I was going to Canada when I was in Sri Lanka, I was super excited. I was young and I had no idea the challenges/struggles and the general uncertainty of moving to a completely different country/culture. I just wanted to leave Sri Lanka because I wanted to be cool lol. I wanted to be that friend that lived abroad. I remember packing up our whole entire house and giving away all of our furniture and belongings to relatives, selling the car and shopping for wintery clothing items. When I told my friends, I don't know if they were happy for me or if they were jealous, but I knew that they all thought that I didn't belong in Sri Lanka. I was not the typical Sri Lankan girl, I wasn't too conservative and I wanted to live somewhere else.

The moving process and leaving all of your friends and relatives behind was emotionally draining to say the least. It was extremely difficult for my parents to leave their well established, well paying jobs for certain, uncertainty. I couldn't imagine what they were going through, or how emotionally strong they had to be, both of them weren't in their 30's when they migrated (like most people) they were in their late 40's and well established. So to think that you had to start your life from scratch in your late 40's must have been so damn scary ... (I have the most wonderful parents in the world, I am so blessed). But they did it, it took us a while to get established but we are here and enjoying the privileges that being a Canadian citizen brings you. My parents were worried to tell anyone about us moving because of the "aswaha" - evil eye for all of you sudda's out there lol.

Leaving my friends was hard (I wasn't sure I could find good friends like them ever)... but I made new friends and I keep in touch with my old friends (thank you Facebook). Most of them are married now and some even have kids! Which is a scary thing for me, to think of all these kids that I went to school with being parents! Cray ... But there is something that all Sri Lankan kids that are immigrants will undoubtedly agree with - your time in school in Sri Lanka is probably the best ever! School here is not that fun .. school in Sri Lanka .. is fun. I would have loved to go to uni in Sri Lanka .. it seems so damn fun! Uni here .. dull.

I was worried about my parents, I had this blind belief that magically everything was going turn out great and that we would be living in this nice house and driving this nice car in a matter of months like we had in Sri Lanka. The reality was much different, we lived in a basement for several months and moved to an apartment, bought a old car and lived within our means for several years before we became established. I remember going to target when we first came to Canada. I took the bus with my sister and my dad .. the first thing we ever bought in Canada was an Iron lol - I think it was to iron my dad's shirts so he can go for job interviews. We still have that iron .. years later. And we still talk about that time we went to get that iron. I was amazed at how organized everything was at target and how clean everything seemed. I didn't know how expensive things were but I remember watching my dad closely, his body language told me everything as he was scanning the prices of all the irons .. things were not going to be as easy as he thought. It is going to be a tough ride.

My parents wanted to leave .. I vaguely remember them having that conversation when we were living in the basement, I am glad we decided to stay. Our lives would have been so different if we had decided to stay in Sri Lanka.

Friday, October 21, 2016

You grow up when you need to?

My cousin, her BF and I were having a celebratory drink the other day and her BF said the most wisest thing - "You only have to grow up when you need to".

 I do consider myself an adult and I am trying my best to think when I started "adulting". I think for me it was when I came to Canada. I think I took it upon myself to support my parents the best way that I could ... and that was not to be a burden on them. I personally never have and never would ask my parents for money. That is something that I cannot bring myself to do. I know everyone's circumstances are different and I do not, in anyway judge people that do take money from their parents. Its a very Asian thing to do .. your parents support you until you get married and then you support them. But I do feel that Asian parents restrict their children from being adults. Am I wrong here? It's almost like they don't want you to be adults,

Anyway for me, my adulting moment was when I was 15 and my dad dropped me off at my very first job at MacDonald's. I knew then and there that I would do whatever it takes to not be a burden on them and make my own way in life... which I have :) since then I have worked at various odd jobs to support myself in high school and also throughout university. I can confidently say now that I am some what of an adult. I still do and say weird things that may seem childish to some, but meh we are all children at heart right?

That is my adulting story .. short and non confrontational .. just the way y'all like it.

Planning a Sri Lankan wedding in Canada ..

So .. I have decided to marry a sudda ... yes yes I know, I know how could I have betrayed my birth land and go over to the "dark side" in this case it is the "light side" (get it ..). Anyway, this decision was made because I took a good look at who I am and realized that I could not possibly be with a Sri Lankan man. Not that there is anything wrong with Sri Lankan guys (even though my blog would say otherwise lol) but I think it comes down to personal preference. I prefer to be with a sudda, maybe because of my own inner struggle of thinking that I have to choose between being Sri Lankan or Canadian. This way, everything balances out, I can be Sri Lankan and he can be Canadian and together we are the best of both worlds! Honestly, I don't know how it happened .. but it did! Maybe I didn't want to deal with all the family drama that comes with being married to a Sri Lankan family - but all families are drama right!, maybe I just wanted to be with someone that was more independent and had their life together (us Sri Lankans can never be independent, we are always for many great and bad reasons locked in to our families - a burden that many people of western cultures don't have) or maybe I am just not attracted to Sri Lankan guys anymore. Regardless, the decision has been made! And it's so damn exciting :D

We are in the early stages of planning this as we have sourced some vendors that we would like to work with and have some great venues in mind. I thought that this blog would be a great way to keep myself in check and also update you all on the wedding planning!

I would also, like to thank you all for the wonderful support you have given me over the years and sending me lovely and sometimes not so nice messages my way! lol

That time we went to Iceland!

I went to Iceland in September this year folks! What an absolutely stunning place! Pictures honestly do not do justice!

But please see some pictures below of our epic adventure!

Beautiful isn't it?

Thursday, March 10, 2016

Dominican Republic

I was down in the Dominican this January! So beautiful! Just like Sri lanka .. made me feel like an island girl again!