Thursday, March 10, 2016

Dominican Republic

I was down in the Dominican this January! So beautiful! Just like Sri lanka .. made me feel like an island girl again!

Monday, March 7, 2016

2016 a Different Type of Year

I realized that I haven't written anything on here for ages .. looking back at the posts i've made year after year made me really want to cringe with embarrassment argh! But I am not going to delete any of the post because I feel like those thoughts and experiences really formed who I am today.

So .. as you know I am dating a white fella now. I shall call him Jay. My parents are cool with this arrangement now and I actually got to meet his parents and siblings as well. Meeting his parents was so easy! His family was so nice and welcoming. Initially,  his mom didn't like me because she always wanted his little boy to get married to a nice, white christian girl .. (Sorry mom!). But now she has gotten accustomed to the idea that her little boy might just end up with a nice-ish, brown, Buddhist girl instead.

When he came and met my parents it was a whole different story .. we cleaned the house top to bottom, made sure that there were like a billion candles lit every where to get rid of any curry smells lol and made sure that there was some white food to eat. My parents were super nice to him even though I knew deep inside that they were uncomfortable talking to a Sudda. I really didn't want to put my parents in an uncomfortable position .. but unfortunately i just happened to fall in love with a very white, very nice Canadian guy. My parents respect that he has accomplished so much and that he has his "shit together". I think that was the biggest thing for me .. to be with someone that knows what they want in life and has goals for themselves. As hard as it is for them to tell their friends and family that their daughter is with a sudda I think the stigma of all that will go away within time. I know some relatives and friends in Sri Lanka will never understand and that they will never accept this .. but it is the choice that I have made for myself. For the better or for worse.

I dont know what I have done to deserve parents as loving and as accepting as mine. I am just truly blessed! I know that many Sri Lankan parents would just reject the idea and not even entertain their daughter or son being with a Sudda.

Like I have said before this blog is about my internal struggle of trying to fit in .. am I Sri Lankan? am I Canadian? I think me dating both a Sri Lankan and a Canadian guy truly justify the internal struggle that I face as a first generation immigrant. I guess I have spent most of my life not in Sri lanka .. so does that make me a Sudda as well? Kalu sudda to be more accurate .. meh the struggle goes on ..

More "being with a Sudda" posts to come I guess .. its been interesting so far!

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Post University Life

When I was in Uni all I wanted was to finish up and find a job and earn some money. Reading back at the posts that I posted when I was in Uni it was so apparent that I wanted to leave.

Did my Friends Change?

My friends that I made in uni are lifers. For me its all about quality and not quantity. I know people that make statements like that are generally loners lol but I don't consider myself an antisocial person. The few friends that I made in uni I still talk too. There are some friends that I made for a semester .. These are the people that I got notes from when I was "sick" aka too lazy to wake up to attend a 8am lecture or people that I sat next too in the lecture everyday. Isnt it weird that when you pick a spot on the first day of the lecture .. that's the spot that you always go too throughout the semester lol. Anyway .. these "semester" friends I have on facebook but I rarely talk too anymore .. These 4-5 lifer friends I cherish and I hope to have for many many years to come.

Did my overall perspective of life change?

Yes. In uni I was so optimistic .. so naive. For example I thought that since I completed a rather competitive and sort after degree I would be getting paid around 100k a year! hahahaha well that shit never happened. I mean .. I am not complaining about what I get paid now .. but to think that I would get something like that with only a couple of  summer internships was kind of ridiculous. I also thought that once I was working I would save all this cash and give it to my parents. Well .. the sad reality is .. once you are out of uni your bills/loans that you accumulated over your uni life need to get paid. And also .. yours truly decided to go and buy herself a nice fancy car .. so that didn't help. I didn't really save a lot in the first year after uni.. but after everything was paid off I started saving a bit and helped the family out as much as I could :)

I also found out that, people are back stabbing, selfish and rude. They would do anything to get a buck of you or to see you fail. I was sheltered in uni, we were this big Utopian family in Uni. But things outside are quite different. Big corporations try to hire you and they suck your drive, intellect and positivity from you .. and leave you high and dry when they find someone younger, faster and eager to do anything at the fraction of the price. It hasn't happened to me yet .. but I am sure in another couple of years it will. I've seen it happen. People are trying to get you .. trying to get your fired or playing some political game at work all the time. People want to see you fail, but you have to rise above all that, as difficult it gets sometimes.

We are in a endless rat race.. people are always trying to show off their successful relationships, getting engaged, throwing the most lavish wedding, buying cars, going on exotic trips, buying houses and making the most perfect family. And then my friends .. after all that is said and done .. we die. The rat race is over .. In Uni I vowed to myself that I wouldn't get caught up in the rat race .. but here I am 3 years later trying to out do all my friends ( come on don't lie to yourself .. you secretly do this as well.. everyone does, unless you are homeless).

Social life after uni?

 The thing about work friends is, they all make the same kind of money as you and they all have the same schedule. So its easier to make plans with them. And once you do make plans you don't have to feel bad that so and so wont be able to afford this etc because we all make money. In uni we went out a lot .. I think that was one of the reasons I was broke lol but I can still go out and have a good time and go on trips etc without being broke .. that's the beauty of being employed. I did waay more activities when I got out of uni. I mean every single weekend this summer I was doing something. In uni .. I couldnt really afford a whole lot and I was too busy being all nerdy and studying. which sucked.

Would you go back to uni?

Yes, I want to do my masters and experience that "post grad" life style. I prob wont do it in Canada and I am thinking that I would like to go to the UK or something to complete it. Thats what the white boy and I want to do anyway .. not now .. maybe in another couple of years when we are more established in our careers. So that way when we do decide to quit our jobs and per-sue education we still have some experience so we can find a job. Uni life was so carefree man .. like when I look back at everything I think to myself .. damn son I didn't do shit when I was in uni. Went to lectures, came home, did a part time job (16-20 hours a week) and just chilled. Didn't work out or nothing because I was young and I didn't have to worry about getting fat, ate so unhealthy because I couldn't afford fancy shit like salad.

Even though now I can afford "fancy shit like salad" I would still go back, because heck .. I want to be young and wild and free again ..

Waterfalls anyone?

Spent the most wonderful time vacationing with the Fam in Valemount/Clearwater. Must see for all Canadians! 

Wednesday, August 5, 2015